i want to drop out of grad school

i am smarter than this, really.

seriously, wtf.
my million dolla idea
doesn't need this tuition

fuck

i wish i wanted to be a soccer mom,
mini van, and a gaggle of brats
and a man who wanted to support all of that

but instead, i'm "creative" and fucked

and tomorrow i have to go play office...

and i don't even get any tonight
ces't la vie
woe is me

guess i'll go eat worms

but i'm happy. just impatient.
i want to be in love
and do things i love
instead of treading water

make sure its waterproof

thats what she said
no really

i have needs
you think i'm hard to read?

its basic. really.

sit and drink beers and have sex on the sofa

eat meat for dinner.

we dream in color

you wouldn't wish on stars,
you know their scientific combination of molecules

but i see how my brain filters light
rods and cones,
26 years of reflections

you can travel with velocity
time and space don't care who you are

a bunny hop
two steps forward one step
back

and i wish on digital clocks

if the rapture takes me

i wouldn't believe it.
i only believe in sandwiches
and thunderstorms

i must be dreaming
as much as i wallow
i quite like it here

jesus seemed like a nice guy
but not those silly people who follow
i would have drank the wine though

see, you are silly

i am just a fool


i just want you to want me as much as i want you.


i am just a fool


I only want proof that you want me too.




so call me silly.

you think i'm funny

but i am still the one after her
i found your ramblings
i try to shut them out but something along the lines,

lets fuck and get breakfast burritos

makes me want to vomit.

its the being idle

and the waiting.
tom petty knew what he was singing about
and i am an american girl

go figure

some are more like the journey songs
and you.

you are like the moon

it's ok

my life won't fall apart
the gates slam too hard, but
you would never understand my optimism
it wouldn't make the world collapse,
i do love, perhaps, or
should i speak in more symbolism?

but really.
fuck it
you only live once

gotta stop...

binge-eating on butterflies
not hungry, for real food
had a hundred different tries
to attempt something new
standing in the living room
thinking of the economy
live alone again
hang with paper clips
prints we made last winter

darling

ride me on your handlebars
take me on the ferris wheel
drink coffee with me in the windowsill
i'm yours
i am

like tegan and sara

i can't get you out of my head...